Review My Vice

My nerdity is well documented here. I feel no need to justify or explain it any further, except to say that this summer could quite easily dismantle what little hope is left for my social life. Honestly, the nerdgasm that 12 year old me is having over the slate of super-hero and 80s nostalgia movies coming out between May and August could easily drown a slightly brain-damaged elephant. Actually, it may be sentences like that that assure my lack of social life… In any case, these are the movies that I’m so excited for that I literally watch the previews and read updates on production daily. Enjoy. Read more…

My love of Shameless is well known. It was my favorite new show of last year, and it’s second season is proving nearly as entertaining. Homeland was amazing. House of Lies, Showtime’s new vehicle with Don Cheadle, has been spectacular so far this year. Dexter was groundbreaking a few years ago, and still remains a guilty pleasure akin to eating Peanut Butter M&Ms at 1am. Californication, Weeds, and a host of second tier shows are still quality television. So, I’m beginning to wonder – is Showtime supplanting HBO as the best cable content provider?

HBO has the best reputation, and there’s a reason for that. HBO was the first content provider to really embrace the long-form story telling that defines these great shows. With The Sopranos and The Wire (two of the greatest shows ever to grace the airwaves), story lines arched across seasons. They redefined the medium, showing everyone else that TV didn’t have to be about 30 minute self-contained sitcoms or soap opera dramas. HBO proved that TV, not the movies, is really the place to build an intelligent drama. HBO redefined the medium, and they’ve got a veritable Mount Rushmore of original content – The Sopranos, The Wire, Deadwood, Boardwalk Empire, Band of Brothers, and Six Feet Under just to name a few. But, as always, the question is, “What have you done for me lately?” Boardwalk Empire’s encore season was terrific, exceeding every expectation. Game of Thrones showed promise, but definitely is a genre with more limited appeal. True Blood is a teen soap opera with vampires. Curb Your Enthusiasm is fun, but predictably formulaic. I love Eastbound and Down, but it only appears on the schedule sporadically and this season is officially its last. I’m not a fan of Treme at all, and Luck hasn’t yet sucked me in.

Soooo… Today, if you had the money to spend on only one movie channel, and you had to pick between Showtime and HBO based on original programming, who would you go with? Personally – I think I may lean towards Showtime. I’d miss Boardwalk Empire a lot, and I’d miss Game of Thrones a little. Other than that? I don’t think I’d miss that much. What about you?

Well, between the site being down for a week and a vacation, I’ve managed to end up a couple weeks behind on my favorite new show from last year, Shameless on Showtime. Today though, we’re catching up and talking about the first three episodes, so let’s jump in.

Initially, I was a little worried that this show might’ve lost it’s way. Shameless is a remake of a British show of the same name, and many of the episodes from last year were borrowed from the British version. This season, all the episodes are new and fresh ideas, taking nothing from the Brits. With that as background heading in, I was a little disturbed to find Fiona serving drinks at a club, Lip running an underground boxing ring, and Frank giving blowies in a bathroom stall. It seemed like the dials on all the characters had been turned up to 10, with well rounded characters suddenly becoming entirely dominated by a single trait (Fiona’s sexiness, Lip’s brains, Ian’s love for the military, Frank’s absolute lack of shame). I think episodes two and three brought us back a little to the family we’ve loved, with these kids scrapping and fighting just to make it through life together, but I still have a bit of wariness going forward. Read more…

It’s the last week of the year, and everyone is feeling all reflective and rolling out their “Best Of” lists. I don’t want to do a lot of them, but I really dug this year’s TV, and I’m excited about next year’s movies, so I’m going to do two lists. That’s it. Unless popular demand requires I do a 10 Favorite Beers of 2011 or 8 Least Favorite Sex Scenes or somesuch. In which case, I’m a whore for my readership. I live to serve. For now, though, TV is the topic du jour.

This year was great in TV, unless you count the network shows (I don’t). I simply refuse to acknowledge American Idol, So You Think You Can Dance and all the other crap as TV (unless I have a buddy competing). I favor strong dramas. I’m a guy so action, crime and violence definitely helps your grade. Last, I’m a fan of realism, so networks that are able to show their world in all its grit have a leg up. So, without further ado, my 2011 TV Top Ten… Read more…

It’s that time of year again! Peppermint schnapps is suddenly acceptable to pour into your coffee, people begin to curse as soon as they open the door and feel the temperature outside, malls become a place of tortured souls and misery straight out of Dante, and people start watching Christmas movies. Last year we reviewed Home Alone, number four on my Christmas movie list. Today, we look at Elf, number three in my top five. We’ll see if we hit the others…

Elf is the story of a human baby raised to manhood in the North Pole by Santa’s elves, who then goes to find his father in New York City. How it didn’t win a couple Oscars is beyond me. I mean, we’re talking about Will Ferrell playing a man believing he’s an elf, learning he’s a man, then being introduced to human society with only elvish knowledge and the advice of what appears to be a drunken Santa Claus. This is groundbreaking stuff, people. And even if those pompous bastards at the Academy are too ignorant to see it, we don’t have to be! Read more…

First, it’s not your fault. In America we make alcohol taboo, making our young people wait 21 years before they’re legally allowed to have a drink, while making them only wait 18 before having a voice in the direction of our country. It’s a little ridiculous. In answer, we have teenagers breaking the rules and getting drunk, we celebrate turning 21 by getting blitzed, and in general we act like a**holes until we’re around 26 and learn to settle it down. Like I said, it’s not your fault. It’s a systematic problem.

Second, you can do better. You can learn how to drink. By this, I don’t mean you can increase your tolerance so that you can put someone under the table, or learn to open your throat so you can take a beer bong faster. Rather, I mean you can learn to experience what alcohol is meant to be. So, without further ado… Read more…